When asked about their goal, someone said, “To be happy.” Why would that be a goal, when it’s something you can have right now? Being happy is about making more decisions, saying yes to more opportunities, doing things that stretch you and contributing beyond yourself. For me coaching has provided all of this and so much more, but when I first looked at coaching I was afraid of failing and of not being good enough, so I procrastinated.
I kept seeing ALL the steps needed to be a coach, which terrified me. It looked daunting and unmanageable and too much for me, so I kept putting off the decision to learn how to be a coach.
I wasn’t a happy person back then. Every time I pulled back from decisions I eroded some of my confidence. The more I procrastinated, the more I could beat up on myself for not being good enough. It was a self-fulfilling prophecy, and I was ultimately frozen with fear.
When I decided to only focus on the next step, I could manage it more easily. I still felt anxious, but less so, and because I was calmer, there was room for some positive thinking in there as well… like, maybe I can do this?
I’ve come a long way since then. Now I feel happier each day. It’s no longer a goal. I’ve learned that playing it safe is dangerous to our self-esteem, so I choose to make the most of every day. The more decisions I make, the more I say yes to possibilities, the more I stretch myself and contribute to those around me, the better I feel.
Each and every day you are either adding to or subtracting from your Happiness Bank. The decisions you don’t make subtract from your Happiness Bank and the decisions you do make add to your Happiness Bank. The longer we sit and “wonder” what to do, the lower the account goes. And no matter what we believe, fear, wonder or ponder, right now we are either adding or subtracting to The Bank.
I aim every day to ADD to my Happiness Bank, and I know I alone am responsible for it. I didn’t know that ten years ago, but I wish I had.