Give Your Shame/Guilt To God’s Spirit

Hebrews 10:22 (WEB)

Advertisements

Toxic Friendships Can Make You Sick

Toxic Friendships Can Make You Sick

It can happen to anyone, sometimes a friendship goes bad.

It can be unpleasant, and researchers claim there is a physical toll that comes from being with toxic friends.

Friendships are supposed to give you a warm and fuzzy feeling, but it turns out, instead of making you feel good some friends can literally make you sick.

“Between the headaches and you’re just feeling like, you just feel bad all over,” one woman said.

As CBS2’s Kristine Johnson explained, science now backs that statement up. A study by researchers at UCLA found that stressful friendships lead to significantly high levels of a protein that causes inflammation in the body. Over time that can cause serious health problems including diabetes, heart disease, and cancer.

“This study is suggesting that there’s more to it than just a psychological impact, that it may be related to health outcomes and diseases that are very common and very severe,” Dr. Daniel Yadager explained.

Dr. Yadager said in addition to eating well and exercising, good relationships can be as important.

“This is also part of leading a healthy lifestyle, is to make sure you’re around people who are nurturing and supportive,” Dr. Yadager said.

Dr. Jan Yager who has written about bad friendships said many people don’t make the connection between illness and bad friendships.

“We like to think that friendship is something that everyone can handle. It’s so much harder to say, ‘my friend is making me ill” Dr. Yager said.

Another problem is that breaking up a toxic friendship can be even harder than leaving a romantic relationship.

“The roots can go a lot deeper. You can’t replace a friendship that goes back to when you’re 5-years-old,” Dr. Yager said.

Ending a friendship itself can be stressful, but there are ways to make it easier. Start by backing off from the friend, be direct about why the relationship doesn’t work, and try to part on good terms.

Dr. Yager said it’s not easy, but worth it in the end.

Experts said when breaking up a friendship it’s helpful to explain that it’s not the other person’s fault, it’s the way you interact.

djs

 

Reject Rejection/Approval of Others!

Reject Rejection/Approval of Others!

Rejection is a lying spirit that draws us into thinking in a way that is contrary to what the Word of God states. Rejection plagues most people and has been built up as a stronghold in many people’s lives.

It creates disunity in relationships, destroys destinies and releases bitterness, resentment and offense.

So, how do we conquer rejection?

Acknowledging you are suffering with rejection is the first step is removing this hindrance from your life. As you recognize rejecting thoughts, casting them down and taking them captive will be instrumental in receiving your deliverance. In 2 Corinthians 10:4-5, it instructs us to take every thought captive. In the Complete Jewish Bible, taking the thought captive actually means submitting the thought and making the thought obey Christ.

When thoughts of rejection come in, you must surrender them to the Word of God. Ask yourself, “Does this thought line up with the God’s Word or contradict what the Bible says about me and who I am?”

Rejection comes in through words people speak to us or actions they invoke on us. Rejection can also be how we perceive a situation. Just as most of the things we worry about never happen, so it is with rejection. We perceive into a situation the thoughts of reactions of another person that are not true and thus it causes us to take on rejection.

The yearning to want acceptance and approval are linked directly to why we feel rejected. We have this longing to fit in, be accepted, exalted and have people approve of us. We are consistently seeking words of affirmation and confirmation of our anointing or a pat on the back for a job well done.

It is when we don’t get an affirmation, a thank you or a firm well done that the spirit of rejection sets in. Coming to the realization that we are accepted and affirmed by God is the key to releasing ourselves from rejection.

As we grow closer to the Lord in our walk, we will internalize that the acceptance and love of the Father is all that really matters. We should desire to love and live in unity with people, but people are not where our identity should come from. Our identity comes from knowing who we are in Christ and whose we are. As we read the Bible and learn about our kingdom inheritance and our rightful position and authority in the kingdom, it will affirm us.

We will then take our eyes off the need for man’s approval and know we are accepted and loved by God. When we know that God accepts us and are living in the fullness of his love and power, what man believes will not matter because we know who we are in Christ. The words and emotions of this world do not have everlasting value compared to who we are in Christ.

When we are seeking man’s approval more than God’s approval, we are idolizing man.  We are saying what they think is more important than what God thinks. God wants no idols before him.

Casting down the thoughts of what other people think is an ongoing battle. However, it is a battle you can conquer. As you spend time in the presence of the Lord, you will become like him and full of His love.

When you are in God’s presence, He will speak to you and reveal the lies you are entertaining in your mind. He will assist you in removing those lies through His Word. When you are reading the Bible, don’t just read, study it so you can learn what the Bible says about you.

By renewing your mind through being in His presence and in His Word, He helps us conquer the insecurities that lead us down the road to rejection.

We are here on this earth to serve God and serve people, love God and love people. If we continually focus on that, then we will never feel we are owed anything. Servants give without an expectation of anything in return.

We have to renew our mind and be servants. We need to give without an expectation of someone saying thank you, that was nice or other words of affirmation. When we give and love with no expectation of anything in return, then we can guard our hearts and minds from rejection, because rejection sets in when we are expecting a return or looking for a response.

Can you conquer the rejection you are faced with today? Yes, you can, and here is how:

  • Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to reveal the pockets of rejection.
  • Repent of where you have taken in rejection.
  • Declare this: I am accepted and loved by God and that is the real truth I need to believe.
  • Ask God to help you get over your need to feel accepted and approved by man.
  • Learn your identity in Christ through reading books and the Word of God.
  • Be love and give by serving without any expectations in return.
  • Take every thought captive and cast out the ones that don’t line up with the Word of God.
Practice casting thoughts of rejection and  peoples approval off you until this spirit is released and conquered 
djs

 

Those Hidden Secrets

Most people have a few hidden secrets.
 
None of them are true, but they are things about ourselves are hope that nobody finds out.
 
This is why a friendly conversation can sometimes turn adversarial, when one or both parties feels like the other person is getting close to that “secret” part of us.
 
This can sometimes come across as feeling on some level that we are “faking it” or that we are somehow an imposter and people knew the truth they’d kick us out.
 
This is one of the main reasons behind self-sabotage. Whenever you start becoming successful, you start to feel like you’re “playing above your skill level.” Maybe you start making some money, start losing weight, or start doing social things you didn’t do before.
 
But part of you is terrified of being found out. Of people looking at you and saying something like, “What are YOU doing here? You don’t belong!”
 
This is common, no matter who you are, or what you’ve accomplished.
 
Paradoxically, for many ultra-successful people, the more successful they become, the worse this fear gets. It’s as if they are always running away from an invisible demon always right behind them. 
 
Of course, this is just a mental construct. Everybody has a hard time understanding themselves, let alone being able to look into your soul with x-ray vision.
 
Which is why when you accept others, you will be like a super hero.
 
When you radiate an aura that says, “I like you, and I accept you JUST the way you are,” people will be drawn to you like bees to honey.
 
Of course, in order to first accept others, you’ve got to completely accept yourself.
 
Some daily quiet time inside your mind is PERFECT for this. Just sit and accept yourself. Appreciate yourself. All of yourself. The good parts AND the “bad” parts.
 
When you get pretty good at this, you can do this little exercise when you’re out among others. As you appreciate yourself, appreciate others as well. 
 
This simple exercise can open up a whole new world of possibilities, one you may have never seen before.
DJS

 

Going With The Flow: Is It Always The Best?

Going with the Flow: Is It Always The Best?
It’s always easier to go with the flow, than go against the flow.
If you are swimming, for example, swimming with the current is a lot easier than swimming against the current.
Often times beaches have “rip tides” which pull swimmers out to sea. The instinct is to swim back towards the beach, but this can get you killed.
Since you’re swimming against the tide, you’ll get pretty tired, and unless you swim on a regular basis, you won’t last long.
Instead, lifeguards say to swim parallel to the beach, until you are out of the “path” of the rip ride. Then you can swim much easier, even though you may be a bit further out. From personal experiences I can tell you this works.  (Whether swimming in Florida, California, Texas coast, or Hawaii.)
When I was in college,we had to write three essays as part of this English class. Then we had to rewrite one of them, for our final grade.
Naturally, we would choose the best one, since that we’d already got a good start. This would make it much easier to get a good grade than if we tried to completely rewrite one that wasn’t so good.
Any time we do something that’s congruent with our nature, it’s easier than something that’s not.
What is in our nature? Being social. Interacting with others. Sleeping at night instead of during the day. Having urges to meet more people. Having urges to make money or create wealth of some form.
Sure, there are exceptions. Some times we want to be alone, sleep all day, and stay away from the opposite sex.
But for most of our lives, we are striving to improve ourselves along these lines. We want better relationships. We want more income. We want more intimacy. We want more understanding/wisdom.
This is human nature. The human condition.
How you do that in your own life will be based on your own personality, likes and dislikes, history, beliefs, and many other variables.
For most of human history, we never really had to think about this stuff. We just kind of did what was natural, and that was good enough.
But now we’ve got an incredible opportunity. To create things with much more specificity. Much more control. Much more creativity. Much more faith.  Much more passion
Every year there are more and more millionaires, some for the craziest reasons, some for pretty boring reasons.
But if you just kind “go with the flow,” it’s not likely to happen.
But when you choose it to happen, and plan it to happen, you can expect it to happen.
Because it will. Passionate Faith is the energy that drives us to excellence. It must always be so.  It’s a LAW of God….and He never changes!
No matter what “it” is. Money. Relationships. A better career. Artistic expressions. Spiritual Wisdom…etc…  In the end, we get to choose.  How good is this?!
What will you create?
(DJS)

 

Don’t Be Chicken!

Isaiah 40:31 But they that wait upon the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run, and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint.
While walking through the forest one day, a farmer found a young eagle who had apparently fallen out of his nest. He took it home and put it in his barnyard with his chickens and there it stayed for years. It wasn’t long before the little eagle learned to eat and behave like the chickens.One day a naturalist passed by the farm and saw the eagle confined in the barnyard with the chickens. When he inquired about this strange sight, the farmer told the man his story. “Unfortunately,” said the farmer, “the poor little guy just never learned to fly.” “Still,” the naturalist sighed, “he has the heart of an eagle and can surely be taught. Will you allow me to work with him?” The farmer agreed, but with much disbelief.

The naturalist picked up the eagle and lifted him toward the sky and said, “You belong to the sky and not to the earth. Stretch forth your wings and fly.” The eagle, however, was confused. He did not know who he was, and seeing the chickens eating their food, he jumped down to be with them again. The naturalist took the bird to the roof of the house and urged him again, saying, “You are an eagle. Stretch forth your wings and fly.” But the eagle was afraid and jumped down once again to be with his chicken friends. Finally the naturalist took the eagle out of the barnyard to a high mountain. There he held the king of the birds high above him and encouraged him again, saying, “You are an eagle. You belong to the sky. Stretch forth your wings and fly!” The eagle looked around, back towards the barnyard and then up to the sky. Slowly, he stretched his wings, and with a triumphant cry, he soared away into the heavens.

Somewhere along the line, we like this poor young eagle, were put in a lowly barn with the chickens of the world around us. We learned to live and eat from the ground and grew up believing that there was not much more to do than sit and cluck all day.

But the reality is that we are eagles! We were created to fly and even soar! God has great purpose for our lives! If we would only realize who we are in Him!

Let’s remember who we are today and stop acting like chickens! We are the head and not the tail! We are Kings and Priests! We have great things to do for the Kingdom!   (DJS)

Making IT Easy!

Making It Easy!

A lot of companies have these “team building” getaways.

Where they go do something outdoors, that’s pretty scary.

The theory is that when they work together, to overcome some kind of physical “danger,” it will strengthen their relationship, making them better workers.

I remember when I went airborne the first time. I was scared as heck beginning training at Ft. Campbell, KY. and right up to jumping out of the plane, but after that, it was pretty amazing.

Once the initial terror went away, it literally felt like flying. Then when I landed, I felt like I was on top of the world. I was now a 101st airborne Eagle…and screaming Eagle!

Like I could do anything.

However, that feeling was gone within an hour. I felt the same as before my jump experience.

They say that you get the confidence after you do the thing.

While this is true, there’s a couple things they DON’T say about this.

One is the “confidence” that you get is generally attached to that particular thing.

Two is that “confidence” doesn’t usually last very long.

Another thing I noticed is that the people who went airborne had lot’s of other fears or issues to work through. (Just because they could jump from a plane did not mean they were fearless people.)

I figured since they’d conquered their airborne fear, they would be ultra achievers who could do anything. I figured I could do anything!

That wasn’t the case. Most of them were regular people, with regular army(MOS) jobs, who spent most of their extra income on their “hobbies.”

(And interestingly enough, a lot of them smoked. A lot.)

Sure, it is possible to get confidence the “old fashioned way.”

Just DO IT, like they say in the commercial, but that’s pretty tough. And it doesn’t last long. You’ve got to keep DOING IT or else you’ll slip back down to where you started.

Is there another way?

Why yes, there is!

Instead of relying on your cave man (or cave woman) programming to consider the possible outcome of what you’re thinking about doing, you can consciously build up the positive, while minimizing the negative.

The more you do this, the easier it will seem, and the more self confidence you’ll naturally have.

Now, this IS a skill, not a magic pill. It will take some practice.

But once you get into the habit of doing it, you’ll find there’s LOTS of things out there that aren’t NEARLY as terrifying as most people think.

What would YOU like to make easy? (DJS)