The Paradox of Influence
Most people have a bad experience with persuasion and influence.
Since most of us are persuaded by others many times before we decide to consciously do the persuading, we start off already behind the eight ball.
The problem is that when most people try and influence others, they go about it the wrong way.
Manipulation, shaming, inducing guilt, and outright bullying are all too common tactics.
So when we think of something we’d like somebody else to do, and we imagine ourselves persuading them to do it, we can’t help but to put ourselves in the shoes of the door to door salesperson who won’t take “no” for an answer.
Since most of us don’t have outright sales jobs, we are usually trying or hoping to persuade somebody close to us.
Or somebody we’d like to be close to us. Not some “mark” who we hope to manipulate out of their life’s savings.
So naturally, we’re a bit shy about using any kind of “tactics” of influence.
We’d rather just leave things they way they are rather than come across as some overbearing salesperson or manipulator.
Luckily, there’s a way to “persuade” that doesn’t rely on any of those door to door tactics.
It’s based on leveraging THEIR inner wants, needs and desires, so they’ll WANT to do what we ask, so long as it matches with who they are and what they’re trying to create.
Instead of shoving something in their face, from “out there,” they’ll be motivated by something THEY want, that’s “in there.”
They’ll see whatever it is you’re recommending (overtly or covertly) as the literal answer to their prayers.
Since they’ll be choosing it for their own reasons, to get their own needs met, they’ll be little resistance.
You don’t need any goofy “closing techniques” or anything like that.
What’s even better, is the more you talk about what THEY want, the easier they’ll decide, on their own, to do what you suggest.
Now, don’t get me wrong. This isn’t magic. This is definitely a skill that you’ll need to practice.
But once you do, you’ll be able to persuade pretty much anybody, anywhere, any time, WITHOUT every worrying about being some slick salesperson trying to sneak a hand in their pocket.
You’ll be seen as a genuine helper, who’ll they think VERY highly of. Help others to achieve their goals and someone else will be there when you need help to assist you in achieving yours.