Caregivers’ Final Confessions…Part 3 of 3
Page 3: 10 Caregiver Confessions: Secrets We Aren’t Proud Of !
Caregiver Confession #8: “I just want to scream, run away, hide somewhere, or change my identity.”
This is likely to happen to even the most patient caregivers. It’s human to feel overwhelmed by the constant neediness of others. It’s time to get some help with your caregiving so you can have a break. However, if you feel like this consistently, you should check with your doctor in case you are depressed or have other health issues of your own.
Caregiver Confession #9: “Maybe if I just take all of Mom’s sleeping pills I won’t have to wake up to this again.”
Get thee to a doctor immediately. Even occasional thoughts like this can mean you are clinically depressed and feel life is hopeless. Please get medical help now.
Caregiver Confession #10: “She is suffering so much. She’s been half dead for months. Why can’t she just let go and die?”
Believe it or not, this is a common thought. You aren’t a bad person. Why would you want to watch day in, day out suffering, where the quality of life, such as it is, is poor. Getting hospice care for the individual can help a great deal. Hospice staff counsels family members and they generally have volunteers who can help you. You need breaks, even if the care receiver could die when you are gone. You can’t sit by their bed side every minute, for months. There are worse things than death, so drop the guilt. You aren’t the only one who has had this thought.
Feel better, now that you know you aren’t alone with your thoughts? I’m sure you can add your own “confessions” to this list. You may even think , “Oh, I’ve thought worse things than this!” If so, share them with caregivers here at hospice. You will quickly see that you aren’t alone.
The main point is that having passing “bad thoughts” is normal. You are tired, stressed and pulled in all directions. People are crabby to you and seem ungrateful. It’s human to have negative thoughts.
However, if you find yourself consistently thinking in this negative manner, it’s time for outside help in the form of respite care for your loved one, breaks for you, or even counseling and/or medication for yourself. You may be depressed. That doesn’t mean you are bad. You are just human. It’s time to accept your humanity and get help. (DJS)
P.S..Thank You for your service and loving commitment!
(Texas Medical Center Hospice)